Funny Guys Bends Over and Shits in Toilet

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Sometimes it can be uncomfortable to poop in a public restroom. Maybe it is especially dirty, or you just can't make yourself sit on the toilet seat because it is cold or otherwise uncomfortable. Whatever your reason, sometimes you would just feel better if you could poop while standing up. There are several steps you can take to make this process easier.

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   Pick the best stall. If you have to poop and find that a public restroom with multiple stalls is your only choice, you can at least pick the stall that will best suit your purposes. First and foremost, make sure that the stall you are in has a functioning lock. The last thing you want is to be interrupted midway through defecating.

   • If cleanliness is a top priority, choose one of the stalls closest to the door. There is research indicating these are used less frequently, so they are typically cleaner.

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   Gather your supplies. You will need toilet paper. Before starting to relieve yourself, check to make sure that the stall or room has plenty of toilet paper and that you can easily reach it. Try placing a small amount of toilet paper in the toilet before you poop. This will help you to avoid having an excessive amount of water splash back up as you do your business.^[1]

   • Consider having some hygienic wipes in your pocket or in your purse. You'll find them useful during the cleaning process.
   • Take some paper towels into the stall with you. They will be more effective than toilet paper in helping to clean up any resulting mess.
   • If you know that you are going to be in a situation where you need to poop standing up, try to make it easier on yourself by choosing your clothing wisely. Ladies, a skirt would be the easiest for you. Simply gather it up and hold it around your waist. Gentlemen, avoid wearing your best pair of dress slacks. This option can potentially be messier than if you choose to sit on the toilet, and you don't want to soil your good clothes.

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   Find some privacy. Some people become nervous before using a public restroom. If this applies to you, there are some steps you can take to make the experience as private as possible. Try to scope out a restroom that is not near the entrance or lobby of a building. These will likely have less traffic, and you will have a better chance of being in the restroom by yourself. Hopefully, that will help ease any tension.

   • If you are using this method at a friends house, you might be concerned that someone will overhear your bathroom activities. Try running water in the sink as you use the toilet. This will create a sound barrier and you might have an increased sense of privacy.

4. 4

   Try squatting. You will actually need to poop squatting, not standing straight up. This will help you make sure that you are aiming properly, and help ensure that you hit the toilet. Squatting will also provide stability, so you will be less likely to wobble.^[2]

   • Bend your knees slightly, and lean forward a little bit to squat. You can also try using your hands to spread your cheeks. This might make the process a little faster and easier for you.

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1. 1

   Wipe thoroughly. It is possible that pooping while standing (or squatting) makes it a little harder to control exactly where your bowel movements go. For this reason, it is especially important that you make sure to wipe your bottom properly and thoroughly. Make sure to always wipe from front to back.^[3]

   • Be gentle, but firm as you wipe.
   • If possible, wet a piece of paper towel or toilet paper (very slightly) to help clean yourself.
   • Consider carrying sanitary wipes with you. Make sure they are not perfumed, or they may irritate your genital region.

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   Tidy up the area. If you have caused any splashing, use a paper towel, toilet paper, or sanitary wipe to mop up the mess. You should also consider wiping the toilet seat if you left any residue. If you used a seat cover, make sure to dispose of it in the toilet or trash receptacle.

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   Wash your hands. Thoroughly washing your hands is one of the best ways to avoid spreading germs. Use hot, not scalding water, and soap. Rub your hands together briskly under the water for at least 20 seconds.^[4]

   • Dry your hands thoroughly, using a clean towel or hand dryer.
   • If a sink is not available, you can substitute hand sanitizer.

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1. 1

   Consider anxiety. Consider the reasons that you want to use a standing method to go to the bathroom. Are you nervous about germs that are in public restrooms? Do you fear picking up a disease? While these fears are common, there is very little chance that you will become ill from a public toilet. Try to find ways to address your anxiety.^[5]

   • If you feel that your fears are interfering with your day to day life, ask your doctor for advice. He can provide you with tips on dealing with anxiety, and if necessary, can refer you to a mental health specialist.
   • Take deep breaths. This will help your body and your mind relax.

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   Avoid public restrooms. Before heading to work or to a social event, give yourself time to go to the bathroom at home. Build this activity into your schedule. For example, if you typically have a bowel movement early in the morning, try waking up a bit earlier or leaving for work a little later to allow enough time. Don't rush yourself out the door.^[6]

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   Talk to your doctor. If your bowel movements are unpredictable, talk to your doctor. Most people find themselves needing to poop on a fairly regular schedule. If you're having trouble predicting when you need to go, you might be suffering from irritable bowel syndrome or another ailment.^[7]

   • Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor in detail about your bowel movement. The more descriptive you are, the more likely it is that he will be able to offer a diagnosis and a treatment.

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• Make sure the back of your pants is not resting against the back of the toilet seat. If the floor is wet or appears to be very dirty, roll the bottom part of your pants up as high as you can get them or take the bottom of your pants and do one fold to or a little past your knee.

• Remove your cell phone or any items that could fall into the toilet from your pockets.

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To poop while standing up at a toilet, first squat over the seat by bending your knees slightly and leaning forward a little. You can also spread your cheeks with your hands to make the process easier and faster. When you're finished, wipe yourself thoroughly with toilet paper or wet wipes to get rid of any mess you made. If you got any residue on the toilet seat, wipe it down for the next person. After you've cleaned up, make sure you wash your hands properly to get rid of any bacteria. For more tips, including how to choose the best stall to use in public, read on!

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